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Old Friend Problem/Need Friendship Advice

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  #1  
Old 07-22-2015, 01:29 AM
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Unhappy Friend Problem/Need Friendship Advice

"Trust in your friends, and they'll have reason to trust in you." - Star Wars: The Clone Wars: Downfall of a Droid


So, yeah... last week... or two weeks ago, I think, I was on YouTube watching a certain YouTube video that I've already seen and I made the mistake of the reading the YouTube comments again (because I'm stupid) and, like last time, the comments were all about this certain fanfiction, which I will not name because you seriously do not want to read the fic, and they were all saying how awful the fic was and blah blah blah and I was like


"Oh, I shouldn't read the fanfic.... but I have to."

Now, just so you know, my friend has already told not to read any of the fics that are about this YouTuber out there and when she told that they were awful, in the moment, I believed her and decided I would never read them... but flash forward into the not so distant future, that was about to change. So, yeah, I read the fic the commenters on YouTube were talking about, plus two others and when I told my friend she was not happy at all... so she blocked me and hasn't spoken to me since in about two weeks. She believes I don't value or trust her opinion and I do. It's just... the temptation to read those fanfictions was too strong for me and I gave into it. Yeah, you all probably think I'm an awful friend. You're probably right.

Anyway, do you have any advice on how to be a better friend and maybe how to get my friend to start talking to me again, maybe help me patch up this relationship. I don't want to lose her. She's a great bff and I don't know what I would do without her. I messed up big time... even if it only was just some bad fanfiction.

Thanks.
  #2  
Old 07-22-2015, 02:01 AM
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Aw, Alexa, I don't think you are awful. Like you said, it was temptation. Just tell your friend the truth, try to get her to understand that it had nothing to do with not trusting your friend's advice; you just couldn't help yourself - curiosity struck.

A while back, in a galaxy far far away, I had to read a book for school. I came across a scene in the story I didn't like and told my Mom. She said she would read ahead and tell me what parts not to read. I trusted her. But curiosity struck. I couldn't believe a certain chapter in the story would have a bad scene, but it did. I was so mad at myself. I should have believed my Mom. I did. But I couldn't help myself.

So, you see, you didn't do anything bad. You're human, and we make mistakes. Lots and lots of stupid mistakes!
  #3  
Old 07-22-2015, 03:59 AM
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Hi, Alexa!

Is your friend usually this sensitive about things? If I were your friend in this situation, I do not see why I would get so upset if you read a fanfiction I told you not to read. I would be able to grasp that you got a bit ahead of yourself and decided to read it.

Anyway, you are definitely not an awful friend! I am feeling what you said, and I am sure you are very sweet and good-natured. This is just a misunderstanding between you and your friend. Akin to what Sapphire said, we are human, so we are very prone to making mistakes. Perhaps try telling your friend that temptation got to the worst of you, and that the matter has nothing to do with trust issues. Additionally, make sure you tell her how much you value your friendship with her.

Oh - I forgot something very vital! As always, apologize for everything. Sometimes, people are not able to see things from your perspective.

Good luck!
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Old 07-22-2015, 05:14 PM
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Oh, Alexa, I'm so sorry that happened. I think your friend may have over reacted. She does not have the power to control what you read, and I know you value her, so maybe you should just told her what you told us. Hopefully she will understand. If not, we are always here for you.

Hugs,
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  #5  
Old 07-22-2015, 06:41 PM
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Aw, I'm really sorry to hear that, Alexa. I don't think you're an awful friend at all - as already said previously, we're all human, and we've all given in to temptation at one point or another. I think you need to have a little more confidence in yourself - you are a wonderful person, and we are all prone to having our curiosity get the better of us every once in a while.
That being said, I agree with Julie and River in that your friend may have been a little too sensitive. I don't have much to add in terms of advice - I think everyone here has got the right idea, that you should talk to your friend and tell her how much you value her friendship, and that what you did had nothing to do with trust issues.
If she is truly a good friend, she will understand. After all, we can't expect our friends to be perfect - we can only ask them to try their best.
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  #6  
Old 07-28-2015, 06:49 AM
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Thanks you all. I really appreciate your kind words and advice. *virtual hugs all around* I will try to talk to my friend again. She still isn't speaking to me... *sigh* :/

Hey guys! So, about five days ago, my friend started talking to me again and we are now totally fine with each other and acting like our normal, fangirly, selves again, so YAY!! Just wanted to tell you all. I really appreciate all the friendship advice you gave me! I'm so blessed to have so many great friends on this site! *virtual hug and virtual cookie stolen from the mod lounge because I am the Winter Batman Soldier Jedi... girl.... *

Last edited by Alexa Diamondflower; 07-30-2015 at 01:17 AM. Reason: Just edited the post
  #7  
Old 07-28-2015, 06:01 PM
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That's great to hear, Alexa! I'm glad everything is okay between you and your friend again.
If you ever need more help/advice, just know that we're here for you!

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  #8  
Old 07-28-2015, 08:11 PM
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I'm glad everything worked out for you, Alexa!
 

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